I see a lot of my parents in me. My dad was loyal, forgiving and compassionate, and my mom was loving, kind and supportive. What I’ve learned in the past 10 months is how to be all of these things to MYSELF.
As some of you may know, I lost my dad suddenly in August and experienced several months of debilitating grief. As I look back on this sad time, I will be forever grateful for what I have learned.
A big part of my grief was the realization that I was no longer a daughter, a role I had known my entire life, since both of my parents were now gone. I was confused and I felt lost. I had to rebuild who I was.
What actually happened was better than I could have ever imagined. Instead of rebuilding who I WAS, I became who I wanted to be, the best version of myself.
Since I was working with a blank slate, I only put back the pieces of myself that I wanted and put aside the rest. This left a LOT of open space for me to Be All There. I continuously strive for this presence each day.
Here are some of the things I’ve found that make me feel happy and healthy and like the best version of myself……so far! Since I’ve written about all of them in previous posts, I’ll just list them here. Please feel free to comment and ask questions on any of these if you’d like more details.
Are you the best version of yourself? If so, that’s awesome! I’d love to hear about what works for you!
If not, it’s never too late (and so worth the effort) to retool who you are, and I seriously don’t think you have to experience what I did to get started. I’d love to use my experience to help you if I can, so please let me know if I can be of any assistance to you on your journey!
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Be All There!
6 thoughts on “Be All There”
I love reading your blog and listening to you as you work through this part of your life. I feel we are all a work in progress throughout our lives. It took me a long time to realize that I was “okay” the way I was. As women we are told we must act a certain way, think a certain way and be a certain way (at least that’s what my mother told me). I realized it’s okay to just be me.
Going back to school gave me the encouragement I needed to find my own voice. Rather than be a person on the sidelines, I became a person who wanted to be heard. Of course, there are times when one must remain silent, but there are more times when I am not afraid to speak up and say something to someone. These were very large revelations for me.
I grew up in a household with a mother who did not work and was always afraid to upset anyone or anything. Rather than this working for her it led to a mental breakdown when she was the same age I am now. Talk about being freaked out when I had my birthday last November! But then I realized, I am not my mother. I am a woman who is independent and who feels there is so much more living to be done.
Life is not perfect, but it’s the only one we have, so we need to enjoy each step along the way.
Thank you Ilene. Glad you made it through your last birthday OK! You definitely are not your mother!
Are you sure Della and I weren’t switched at birth? Or at some other time? I know Della has a ton of my mom in her, but I guess I never realized how much of you I have in me! ❤
I guess the traits are all there and come out in different ways in each of us. XOX
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